Yet more dreams

September 30th, 2003

I came up with a cracker of a joke this morning. I was very proud of myself…

Have you heard that Gareth Gates is going to re-market himself as a rap star? He’s going to call himself ememem.

Anyway, now that the tumbleweeds have been chased out of the room, I can report on my latest weird dream nonsense. I really must get a firm matress and a soft pillow - it’s the perfect combination for disrupted sleeping, a stiff neck and most importantly - remembered dreams.

This time the dream was a bit like the matrix in that I was running about in a long black coat and doing cool stuff in bullet time. I can’t remember what the cool stuff was but I had the power to slow time and so did lots of others who were all trying to perfect their skills and become the ultimate cool dude or something.

To pass as the ultimate cool dude you had to run right to the top of a very tall, disused roller-coaster. The problem was that the top of the roller-coaster was vertically steep and made of teflon. This made it very hard to cling on to, and slowing time was of no help.

At the top of the roller-coaster was Uma Thurman in a short skirt dressed very colourfully in pinks and oranges. If you reached her then you knew you had made it.

The next part of the dream was in an underground bunker where people who had made it go. I can’t remember how I got to the top of the roller-coaster, but I did do it. I’m disappointed that I can’t remember that part because it really was a very short skirt and I’m sure she had leather boots on too.

Anyway, in the bunker I was shown around. They were making a lot of strange gadgets like prosthetic limbs that did sinister things. I remember feeling like there was a big choice to be made. Do I stay in the bunker and help these guys who I felt like were the baddies, or do I leave and stay a good guy? Then I woke up.

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